It’s Hump Day! That means it’s time to pick a NSFW GIF, a new-ish tradition we have explained in this very NSFW post. And even though it’s only Hump Day, I am off to the beach. In that spirit, we bring you some nice, relaxing GIFs from Tumblr user Awintyyr, a digital artist from Sweden. I bet these are totally SFW in Sweden, actually.

I’ll be at the beach, suckers!

Today is the one-month anniversary of our new Wednesday night tradition, the NSFW GIF of the Hump Day. To celebrate this most unholy of occasions, we’ve picked a series of GIFs that feature porn star/conceptual artist Colby Keller, one of the stars of our inaugural post
NSFW GIF of the Hump Day: Ryan Harman Fixing Jeff Koons With Gay Porn.

When Brooklyn-based fashion designer BCALLA launched their Fall/Winter 2015 collection, they opted to collaborate with gay porn producers Cocky Boys for their promotional campaign. BCALLA is known for futuristic, barely-there, gender-bending garments in a cartoon palette. It’s pretty much the aesthetic opposite of most gay porn—a genre that tends to fetishize hyper-masculinity in settings like office boardrooms or abandoned warehouses. These sets, however—from designer Michael Burk—look straight out of the queer-camp classic But I’m A Cheerleader.

The result is a surrealist muppet orgy that’s closer to a very-adult children’s show than any other images produced by either the fashion or porn industry.

As a connoisseur of fandom cultures, I love fanworks. Fanfiction, fan art, fanvid — all are unique manifestations of internet-based outsider art practices, and often times far more interesting than their source material. (In fact, the argument could be made that the most subversive works come from the most innocuous fandoms, like boyband slash or you know, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.)

For this week’s NSFW GIF of the Hump Day, we delve into the “pony-related lewd animations” of artist Spectre-Z.

Get your feral fandom on after the jump.

This is Fluttershy, the comely pink-haired pegasus. She lives in a cottage near the Everfree Forest. Yes, she is being penetrated by a floating penis, or magical dildo.

The top: Maud Pie, celebrated rock science poet. The bottom: her younger sister, Pinkie Pie, an earth pony who likes to laugh and bake cupcakes topped with hot sauce.

If you’re curious to see more of Spectre-Z’s work, you can check out her Tumblr.

This week, we return to our NSFW GIF of the Hump Day series with a bang.

Tumblr content usually falls into one of several categories: net art, pop-culture meme GIFs, niche porn, or conspiracy theories. Thankfully, Tumblr user/artist PEEKASSO has merged all of the above into one glorious online practice. Homer Simpson navigating a world of scantily-clad women sent to distract internet users from the Illuminati/CIA’s real agenda? Naturally. Other times, PEEKASSO puts the “dick” in Phillip K. Dick quotes.

But our favorites are below, starting with “lucky lady”, in which controversial Mad TV character Ms. Swan appears to be looking over the shoulder of the Brady Bunch‘s Jan as she watches doggy-style porn. The final side of the panopticon is completed by a peeping-tom cartoon character, or as the “loading” pinwheel would imply, perhaps us voyeuristic viewers on the other side of the ever-present screen.

Continuing our foray into NSFW fan GIF art, I’m really intrigued by the creativity that abounds in the furry fandoms. Their conventions seem to be a flashback to what I’d like to imagine Madchester early acid house to be like: a rave new world, but with frolicking fursuits. Live long, and prosper. Get your yiff on.

Of course, burrowing deeper in the rabbit hole, I have one question about mature anthropomorphic fanart: why are all the canon female characters consistently being penetrated by a floating penis or dildo?

After the jump, we look at the 8-bit GIF work of MawiIes, an Animal Crossing: New Leaf artist on Tumblr who is really into the puppy character Isabelle, and her futanari selfcest potential.

Animal Crossing: New Leaf fan art by Snopia Sketches.

First off, here’s what you need to know about the Animal Crossing: it’s like The Sims, but sans strategy. The Nintendo 3DS video game is a cutesy, cartoony life simulator along the lines of Minecraft where you get to hang out with animals, catch fish, collect furniture, outfit your own town and cultivate horticultural wonders. Your only challenge, in the words of an AC fandom Redditor, is “pay[ing] off your house to the tanuki swindler who makes Shylock look charitable.” (Another challenge may be it’s addicting real-time nature, where game time occurs on a regular seven days a week, 24 hrs a day clock.)

A major part of the game’s appeal is building close relationships with the virtual characters. Isabelle, a Shih Tzu-like puppy who made her debut in Animal Crossing: New Leaf, and in the professional service as secretary, assist players in their new role as the town mayor. If you flip on the game in the morning, Isabelle will greet you: “good morning, mayor!” According to her fan wiki, she is absent-minded, and sometimes shows signs of affection for a player, especially on Valentine’s Day.

I don’t really know MawiIes, but according to their Tumblr profile, they love boobs and butts, so it’s no surprise that their pièce de résistance at the moment is the above futanari selfcest. Futanari, a popular shemale fetish among hentai manga fans, puts an interesting spin on a personal assistant video game character — some consider it a so-called “erotical illusion”, where the juxtaposition of the hyper-feminine (boobs) and hyper-masculine (big dicks) is a turn-on, supposedly for the typical heteronormative cisgender male.

Mawiles employs a similar juxtaposition in portraying a 3DS character in an old school 8-bit Nintendo system aesthetic — Isabelle is a plush toy dream, so turning the clock back suggests video game nostalgia, or an artist who has relied on a Deviant Art 8-bit Isabelle style sheet.

There’s also a real commitment in the GIF’s long-play loop — the narrative arc is true to the typical futanari fantasy, which ends with cum geyser sprays. I’m unsure about the selfcest dynamic here — is Isabelle being penetrated by a past, future or even alternate version of herself? —  but at the very least, it explains the floating penis and/or dildo.

James Kerr, who goes by the Tumblr username Scorpion Dagger, makes GIFs using imagery sourced mainly from Renaissance paintings. In his animations, biblical figures and saints navigate contemporary problems such as pizza addiction, pop-up porn ads, office holiday parties, and even drone strikes. After the jump, there’s more NSFW art-historical action than Jerry Saltz’s Instagram account. 

This week’s NSFW GIF of the Hump Day comes to us from Zak Krevitt. In addition to a kinda-NSFW photo practice that occasionally features more-or-less SFW GIFs, the artist has an active kink-centric Twitter profile. His work often documents or exists within queer/fetish subcultures, such as the phenomenon of pup play, where humans role play as either dogs or their masters.

For an idea of how one might achieve the illusion of a wagging tail on a human body, check out the gorgeously-rendered “Butt Plug for Technic”:

Queer game designer Robert Yang makes really, really strange homoerotic POV simulations. His latest? “Rinse and Repeat,” A game that simulates waiting in real time for this guy to get out of gym class and hit the showers:

Isn’t than an uncannily sexy shoulder? Yang explains his motivations and impressive rendering techniques in a pretty thorough statement:

“I wanted to use fluids and their interactions with surfaces to emphasize the dude’s body and its shape. The way fluids follow the contour of his shoulders, for example, mirror the way your hands follow the contour of his ass. ‘If only I could be that water.'”

The ideas of seduction and unfulfilled desire manifest in some pretty strange ways throughout the game, from a violent drowning fantasy to “winning” by being rejected. 

Although these GIFs are great, they don’t do justice to how surreal this game is with audio. so watch the Youtube preview below:

This is just the latest video game Yang has developed to explore unfulfilled homoerotic fantasies, race and body anxieties, and the border between sex and violence. “Hurt me Plenty” casts the player as an S&M top who must alternate between simulated violence and emotional tenderness with his submissive partner.

I’m not exactly sure how gameplay works in “Succulent,” but apparently the objective of the game is to get this guy to eat as many phallic foods as possible:

Today, I tried to find a GIF to congratulate Nicole Eisenman on her Macarthur Genius Grant win. I was hoping someone out there had animated some of her raunchier queer-tastic work into a splendid loop of twitching, painterly genitalia.

Instead, when I put the “animated” filter on Google Image search and typed in “Nicole Eisenman”, this came up:

The image is hosted on this page, a slideshow of highlights from the 2014 Armory Show where Koenig & Clinton were showing Eisenman’s work. And also ads for sex toys.

Welcome to TestPress.net, the site of Johnny Chiba, who blogs about art and music (using many GIFs) and is sponsored by testicle.com, a website that explains itself in GIF format:

How exactly does one get to be a GIF-filled art blog that gets sponsored by a GIF-filled Adult Sex Toy Warehouse? No, really—I want to know.

Testicle.com is full of GIFs of dildos. Some of them are Marvel superhero-themed, like “The Incredible HUNK“:

There’s also a product that looks like a silicone mannequin torso with a built-in dildo. When you click on that, it directs you to “The Biggest Dildo Store on the Internet” where the “Mega Masturbator” is advertised with a video that depicts a man wearing a “Fuck me Silly Dude” T-shirt furiously attempting to rip the dildo off of the torso in a remarkably un-sexy way. After about 30 seconds he says something along the lines of “I don’t know what they’re talking about. There’s no way to break the penis. I mean, what could they possibly be doing to this that they would do to a real penis?”

This is truly one of the stranger pieces of video I have ever seen in my life… and I have seen a lot of weird shit. The video is especially odd given that there’s no introduction explaining why the man is trying to castrate the sex doll. It is probably the least effective piece of advertising in the history of advertising.

All of which leads me to believe that maybe all of this sex toy sponsorship is actually a really brilliant art project that’s somehow more fleshed-out (no pun intended) than the actual art blog?

Which isn’t to say I didn’t enjoy getting lost on Test Press for a few dozen minutes. Johnny Chiba also animated a drawing by Sergio Zuniga into this horrifying NSFW GIF appropriately titled “Puke Thing”:

For the full experience, look at it on this page, where it is accompanied by sound effects.

It’s nice to know that there is someone else out there in the world whose job description involves both art fairs and NSFW GIFs.

Anyway, Nicole Eisenman is great.

So is the internet.

These GIFs may be NSFW, but they’re really no more escandaloso than that giant pixelated sexy dancing lady on the Miami skyline. If you worked in an office building across the street from that building, you could probably definitely look at these GIFs from Tumblr user N-LITE at your desk.

Don’t they make you think of an 80s music video with a sieve-like plot involving a lonely video game designer and a lightning strike that somehow brings his sexy digital creations to life? Pygmalion for the pixel generation? Playboy for the Gameboy Color?

Anyway, I think I like these because they’re moreso about the idea of sexyness rather than actually being sexy, like art about scrambled porn or the mudflaps with “hot chick” silhouettes you see on trucks.

This Summer, we checked out Wickerham & Lomax’s winning Sondheim Prize installation at the Baltimore Museum of Art. That exhibition offered dark humor informed by a queer perspective on various subcultures—dominated by larger-than-life hazing paddles emblazoned with Greek letters. Here, they’ve sent us a GIF vision of frat-boy hell. A hunched figure’s naked body distorts and wobbles as it’s bombarded with an avalanche of beer bottles, and, of course, the ubiquitous paddle. 

Yes, someone made a spooky animated GIF of Marina Abramović’s 2005 work “Nude with Skeleton“.

This would be such a good Halloween costume!

There’s something rather both meditative and masturbatory about Kelton Sears’s self-described “poop loop”.

The GIF is a simple black and white digital drawing of a balding male figure, in a yogic squatting pose, expelling a smaller version of himself. The smaller version tumbles in free fall, and after spinning into a Christ pose, becomes the bigger version we see at the beginning of the loop.

Here, pooping back and forth forever with one’s own self suggests that our tiny and big egos are continually tossed in a cycle of consumption. The raw material is always in a constant reprocessing state. Similar to Piero Manzoni’s “Artist’s Shit”, the literal physical release could conceivably be a metaphor for artistic labour.

This work is part of Digital Sweat Gallery’s “Belfie Stick” group show, on now until November 18. Also worthwhile checking out are the comix animations Sears creates for the Seattle Weekly, like this “GIF Comic Tour” of legendary clay animator/Frank Zappa collaborator Bruce Bickford’s studio.

This GIF from Kyra Clayden features a reclining woman spread-eagled in a Hockney-esque painting. By her high-heeled feet, a pet cat gives the viewer a grumpy stare. The image comes in and out of focus, zooming in on the figure’s vagina. Scrolling text reads: “this is Rubin. She is one of numerous natural born feril-female woman who have XY Chromosomes”

It’s a great painting, and as a GIF, it reminds us that genitalia—an ever-popular subject matter in representative art—are really nothing to write home about.

Here’s the artist’s full description of the piece posted to Rhizome:

Species from the zone of avoidance (or why posthuman boys will be girls and girls will be boys)

I painted the work this year, after finishing I took a photo of it and created a gifanimation. The painting is called “Gayle Rubin with Pet Califia”. It’s a reference to the contemporary philosopher Gayle Rubin and here companion and writer Pat Califia. I changed the orthographies of these names in my work and called the cat Pet Califia. The mane protagonist I called Geile Rubin because Germans would pronounce Gayle this way and it means horny. So what we see is indeed a Girl with a Pussycat and all its patterns. Does this remain the same if we reveal here real nature? In the gifanimation showing a woman, subtitled “ceci n´est pas une femme”, appears a sentence explaining one of the most important revelations in science of the 20th century: everything vice-rally important to the survival of the human body and everything that distinguishes human being in its self, is encoded on one chromosome, on the X chromosome. Female and male genes with programmes delivering plans for the built of procreative organs also are both, male and female, written on the X chromosome. The Y chromosome is a new evolutionary invention and very young. It has been invented and created by the X chromosome to perform a better exchange among the various X chromosomes. The Y chromosome is a degenerated X chromosome now very small and still degenerative. It degenerates each time it is being reproduced. It executes the definition of what we like to interpret as male procreative organs, from the X chromosome. There are human beings with XX chromosomes, Xy chromosomes and there are also normal men and fathers with XX chromosomes and there are normal birth-giving woman and mothers with Xy chromosomes.

Since hundreds of century’s sons are being privileged because of the belief that they carry all the superior informations of mankind.

The belief is also that sons heredit the information characterising their fathers personality and ability and represent the entire fathers line of ansesters that the son is supposed to reproduce again.

If a man and a woman have a daughter, she is going to heredit the X chromosom of the mother and the X chromosome of the father. A son heredits the X chromosome of the mother only. Everything he is comes from this side.

It is far about time to rethink our concepts of identity. It is beautiful performing femininity and it is beautiful performing masculinity, taken them as for what they really represent, as cultural assets means to open the benefit in a wider range.

 

This dizzying GIF depicts a spinning CGI bald man in the fetal position covering his eyes while he gives himself a BJ, exposing his butt hole in the process. Something about it, though, makes it feel more New-Age-y than pornographic. It could be that his hands look like they’re praying and he’s seemingly levitating over a serene pool of water. Or the fact that he’s spinning in such a manner that his toes form the points of a pentagram. Maybe it’s because this is what watching people do yoga is like?

At any rate, it’s a dude pleasuring himself who looks embarrassed:

Who made this?
“Enlighten” me.

Okay, I usually have a strict policy of ignoring any and all things related to the Kardashian brood (why are they even famous?) but this is amazing. Remember how people wouldn’t shut up about Kim’s butt on the cover of Paper Magazine last year? It “broke the internet” as kids these days say. Buzzfeed even ran the very-important listicle “9 Kim Kardashian Butt GIFs You Have To See” (no, you don’t have to see them).

At any rate, the below GIF is way better than any of the others, because it features Danny DeVito—a celebrity whose rotund butt in the nude is always hilarious rather than annoying.

And much like the most famous of all butt GIFs, Hypno Butt, I can’t stop staring at this and I don’t know who made it. GIF provenance is as mysterious as the reasoning behind the Kardashian notoriety.

Googling x-rated Santa brings back a variety of results ranging from the predictable to the head scratching. For all the dirty Santa sex you’re certain to find, you also see a lot of pizza, a gay man’s butt, and a group of black women dancing. Also: Will Ferrell in an elf costume. Just try googling anything to do with Christmas without landing on a picture of him.

The GIF below maybe the most frightening result we’ve found thanks to Google. Scroll down if you dare.

Thinking back on all the cultural patrimony lost during 2015, there’s at least one thing that’s still glimmering with hope: Blingee. While this year saw ISIS plow through irreplaceable ancient cities, right-wing vandalism of artwork in Russia and France, and countless pieces of important architecture felled by asshole developers—I’m looking at you David S. Brown, destroyer of the singular, gorgeous Mechanic Theater—the GIF-making site Blingee faced deletion but managed to stay alive.

Let’s celebrate this small victory by reveling in the shamelessly trashy vernacular GIFs that wish us all a sexy new year:

What can be said about “boobs.gif”? They’re boobs, they’re bouncing, and they’re from the internet. Thank you Faith Holland [h/t Animal New York] for cutting out all the spam, social media, and opinionated bloggers to distill the internet down to its purest form and most noble content.

Madrid-based artist Claudia Maté created this character that seems to be a response to the “Girls Don’t Poop” meme. She’s exaggeratedly sexy, except she’s spewing diarrhea as she dances. It is amazing, and maybe serves as a reminder to avoid certain foods before heading to the club.